Written 13 July 2003
[The Earth as seen from space, except Australia is upside down.]
In a world gone frighteningly sane ...
[Quickly ZOOM IN on upstate New York.]
... in a suburb of Albany, a man from the future of the past must be prevented from changing the present into the future.
[CUT TO James "Kibo" Parry sitting under a tree, looking at the screen of his iBook. The Apple logo is prominently displayed.]
Ah, tj frazir, will you ever learn?
[He starts typing. Suddenly, a naked Gilbert Gottfried appears and extends his hand to Kibo.]
Come with me if you want to live.
[FX: GIANT DUST BUNNY]
Meanwhile, in the future, robots from the past are sent to the present to bring about something. Wackiness ensues.
[Cut to DALEKS, led by ARNOLD SCHWARTZENEGGER in a cylindrical wheelchair. He speaks through a vocoder with a German accent.]
YOU MUST EX-TER-MIN-ATE KIBO!
[As the DALEKS start to roll off aimlessly, a couple of them EXPLODE COLORFULLY for no apparent reason. While this happens:]
Simultaneously, at the same time, ten minutes ago, members of a local high school have to prepare for the visit of a very special celebrity.
[Cut to French James Brown, a gold lamé beret on his head, dancing languidly on a stage.]
FRENCH JAMES BROWN:
Saut en arrière! Je veux m'embrasser!
[We hear FUNK MUSIC PLAYED ON AN ACCORDION. Cut to credits.]
Terminator 4: And Then There Were Twelve. Coming soon to a theater near you.